• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer
  • Events
  • Articles
  • Contact
kentuckiana health collaborative 1

Kentuckiana Health Collaborative

Building a bridge to better health, better care and better value

  • About
    • Mission
    • Staff
    • Board of Directors
  • Strategies
    • Improve Healthcare Quality
    • Make Healthcare More Affordable
    • Build Healthier Communities
  • Initiatives
    • Community Measurement
    • COVID-19
    • Health Equity
    • Kentucky Core Healthcare Measures Set
    • National Hospital Price Transparency Study
    • Opioids and the Workplace
  • Members
    • About the Membership
    • Current Members
    • Member Resources
    • Member Portal
  • Join
Home / Community Health / Grieving the Loss of My Mother and My Caregiver Title

Grieving the Loss of My Mother and My Caregiver Title

Filed Under: Community Health November 25, 2020, Randa Deaton

Eleven years ago, I gained the title of caregiver, when my mom was diagnosed with late stage ovarian cancer. As a mother of young children, I also gained the distinction of being part of the sandwich generation, caring for both children and aging parents at the same time.

In the United States, there are more than 40 million American caregivers like me who support aging parents, ill spouses, children, and other loved ones. Caregivers provide billions of dollars’ worth of long-term care and caregiving services each year. This November, we recognize the contributions of caregivers across the nation during National Family Caregivers month.

Like many caregivers, my role changed over the years depending on mom’s needs. I have been by my mom’s side advocating for optimal care and her quality of life at every surgery, consult, and hospitalization and nearly all of the hundreds of labs, infusions, appointments, chemotherapies, scans, blood infusions, and injections. Along the way, I have “played” the role of doctor, nurse, bather, aide, pharmacist, therapist, scheduler, wheelchair pusher, travel agent, makeup artist, hairdresser, interior designer, gift wrapper, driver, nutritionist, chef, event planner, comforter, but mostly the role of student of life.

RandaAndMom
Randa and her mother, Marsha J Phillips.

Being a caregiver has been one of my most proud titles, and the responsibility of the role impacted me and my family profoundly. It is in this role that I became a student of the remarkable woman I got to call Mom. She could find joy and laughter in the worst of circumstances and always lived in the moment. She knew that memories were the things that would carry on her family and prioritized memory making in ways we would not have done without her illness. I saw what true courage and strength was, not only in the ways that we often associate with cancer, but in her humility and trust in others at her most vulnerable moments. I learned most from my mom that people are the most important thing in this life, and she made a point to make everyone feel special, worthy, and loved, including me.

On Thursday, November 19, 2020, my mom peacefully exited this world in her home surrounded by those who loved her, just as she had wanted. This month I lose the title of “caregiver,” but I will not lose its lessons.  

Similar Articles

shutterstock 556416004 1 1

National Influenza Vaccination Week Highlights Ongoing Importance of Flu Vaccination

December 16, 2020

Every year, flu season occurs during the fall and winter in the United States. It is recommended that everyone six months and older receive a flu vaccine yearly to protect themselves from the virus. Flu vaccination can help reduce the severity of flu illnesses, doctors’ visits, and missed obligations as […]

Read More
shutterstock 1689338029 1

Employer Cohort Convenes on Addressing Opioid Misuse and Pain

November 24, 2020

From November 2019 to April 2020, the Kentuckiana Health Collaborative convened a group of 22 employers to collaborate and take a deep dive into how they can support their employees and business in the prevention, treatment, and recovery from opioid misuse and disorder, and the diagnosis, treatment, and management of […]

Read More
shutterstock 1693225201 1

The Impact of Cannabis in the Workplace

October 26, 2020

The legalization of cannabis has gained significant political and cultural traction over recent years. Despite being illegal on a federal level, many states have moved to legalize the substance or derivatives of it. Although conversations typically focus on legalization or lack thereof, the topic is quite nuanced and must consider […]

Read More

Get the latest articles and updates.

Our email newsletter shares our latest research, initiatives and events.

Footer

  • About
    • Mission
    • Staff
    • Board of Directors
  • Members
    • About the Membership
    • Member Resources
    • Join the Membership
  • Strategies
    • Improve Healthcare Quality
    • Make Healthcare More Affordable
    • Build Healthier Communities
  • Initiatives
    • Community Measurement
    • COVID-19
    • Health Equity
    • National Hospital Price Transparency Study
    • Opioids and the Workplace
  • Connect
    • Events
    • Articles
    • Contact
khc logo blue

(502) 238-3603
1415 Bardstown Road, Mailbox 19, Louisville, KY 40204

Copyright © 2021 · Kentuckiana Health Collaborative · Privacy Policy · Sitemap · Stop Animations

We use cookies to ensure that we give you the best experience on our website. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it.Ok